Turning thirty-five

At the end of September, I turned thirty-five. The Friday before my birthday, Nicholas gave me my birthday presents early – a new coffee setup! We do have a larger automatic pour over coffee machine that we pull out when we have more than a few people over for company. But for some time, I'd been using a coffee grinder from college and an electric kettle that had seen better days. He meticulously researched a combination of brewing tools that would enable me to brew two cups at once (for him and I or for me and a friend), and give a consistently good cup of coffee. And I absolutely love it. The hand grinder is actually fun to use, and I love brewing the coffee into the glass pitcher, and then pouring into our mugs. We spent the weekend fine-tuning our brewing for our favorite coffee.

Cooper made me the sweetest card, featuring a picture of "all my boys." (Please note Nicholas' mustache, and his arm around Cooper). The boys helped Nicholas wrap my gifts, and Cooper chose a zinnia from our garden for me. On Saturday, we went to Chicago, followed by the Harvest festival on Sunday. We enjoyed sourdough cardamom bread as an early-birthday treat over the weekend, as well as some yogurt snacking cake (cardamom and orange zest) that I baked the day before my birthday.

Monday night brought a girl's night with some friends. We didn't coordinate desserts, so we all made something – and got to have a little dessert a la carte! Arlo tagged along to girl's night, since he sticks pretty close to me in the evenings. My friend Molly gave me a "Life your eyes" mug from Brighter Day Press, and I need this reminder daily.

My friend Jessica gave me the sweetest little gold hoop earrings. My SIL and BIL gave me a trio of body butters from Primally Pure. My friend Rachael sent a pair of glass travel coffee mugs (plastic-free!) that we have been enjoying so much. And my FIL gave me an organic cotton cardigan.

My friend Kathleen gave me a copy of Susan Branch's heartwarming and nostalgic Christmas book, served me breakfast AND lunch, all while our boys kept themselves extremely busy playing together. A soul-rich morning.

On my actual birthday, we had a mostly ordinary day. We did homeschool and a little yardwork, which included some deadheading and picking the ripe tomatoes from the garden. I talked to my parents on the phone for awhile, which was so good. And that evening, we had brats and hot dogs on homemade sourdough buns, for dinner. There were sweet birthday texts and friends and family who called and messaged, as well.

And Nicholas and I spent the evening together, after he worked a day in Chicago. We don't do grand birthdays, but even if most of the day was ordinary in some regard, I always feel extremely loved on my birthday.

At thirty-five, I am spending my days with a ten-month-old in the baby carrier, or at my feet (or, throwing dirt out of our houseplants). My 3.5- and 6.5-year-olds greet me with the loudest, "Mommy!" in the mornings. Much of my time is spent preparing food, cleaning the kitchen, caring for precious little boys, keeping the home, and doing house admin. This is my second fall in the role of "teacher," a role that feels weighty and sometimes very difficult, but often wonderful. I learn right alongside Cooper. I find great joy in a fresh garden tomato, food cooked on the grill by Nicholas, and homemade sourdough baking. I frequently feel overwhelmed by what I would like to do in a day, and I often overestimate what I can accomplish in a day (those are related). Knitting is still my favorite hobby, it's a creative outlet and a regulating tool for me, too. I feel most content when I have good boundaries with my phone, when I am reading my Bible consistently, when I am feeding myself nourishing meals, when I go with the boys when they are playing outside, and when I sit down and do one task at a time (eat, chat with Nicholas at the end of the day, etc).

I am feeling deeply encouraged by my current devotional, Life Your Eyes, by Whitney Newby, and the reminder to shift my gaze heavenward, moment by moment. I feel about a month behind in writing on this blog, but I know that at some point, I may "catch up," or even if I don't, it's still of value to me to share bits of our life here. I am still in the habit of noticing the seasonal light in our home, and the shifts in color outside our windows. I am so glad to be married to a man who makes me laugh and cherishes me, a man who adores his children and makes sure to tell them that.

I am wholeheartedly aware of my need for a Savior each and every moment of this life – and wholeheartedly cheered by the joy there is to be found in a life lived with Christ! Thank you, God for another year of life. What a gift.